Family Portrait

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. 

Trust me; I have been listening to that song for all my life but yet, I still can't pronounce that word above. 

Last weekend, my childhood memories were rekindled again after watching Saving Mr Banks. 

I believe you have watched Mary Poppins when you were young - colourful and joyful ain't it? 

But did you know the inspiration behind was so dark and tragic?

I never knew either until I watched Saving Mr Bank - the movie centred on the fort-night long developments PL Travers (author of Mary Poppins) with Walt Disney  in agreeing the screenplay right. 

Mr. Banks is the patriarch of the family who is so obsessed with his working life that he doesn't have much time for his children. Travers believed that Mary Poppins (her aunt) came to the Banks family to save Mr. Banks from his unfulfilled life and to make him realize that family was his real priority. Travers' father was a bank manager who died when he was in his 40s of alcohol-related diseases. Travers, in turn, wished she could have saved her father from his own demons.

Anyhow, watching her struggle in the movie, it reminds me of my struggle during my preteen years when family breakdown struck me. I'm not sure it is a jinx or mere coincidence, most of the gay friends that I know came from broken families. 

I know times are hard when the screaming and yelling fill-up to the roof. It won't be forever. Be strong and those things never turn out your way but everything will be alright.

Let end this entry with a lullaby by Mary Poppins:

August Gay

Sometimes I really need to reflect my verbal communication etiquette. I can be so mean with my words most of the time. I'm not a meanie but just being outspoken or as how my boo labels it 'critical thinking'.

One of my favourite targets gotta be my ex-friend. His daily posting is like daily entertainment for me - it triggers me to polish my level of sarcasm. And apparently, no one wished him happy birthday :( The only person who wished him was his mom...awww...poor thing....I didn't wish him though coz i failed in his re-evaluation of being his friend. You don't expect some stranger pop up in front of you and wish you happy birthday right?

Anyhow, I also like to target those gay people. I know right, being gay and attack those gay people back. Seriously, if you scroll down my Facebook, you would know how i feel. The postings are either gym or swim or selfie without shirt on or new shirt on - can they like post something new or something thought-provoking that can portray gay community a lot smarter and more august? 

I'm not a warlord in this community so i don't dictate what a gay should do. But thank God that most of my gay friends are a bunch of modest, reserved and smart people. That's why I'm so proud to have them.

Lips Inches Away

How was your Valentine's Day?

Mine was a stressful and messy one. But at least i could spend the night with him and i could not ask for more.

I always wonder have we really lost our minds to become this close. We are not officially together coz none of us is ready for relationship. Having said that, I'm not taking him as my temporary partner to fill in my spare time or taking him as my fling. In fact, i'm exploring opportunities to forge a committed and serious relationship. But I'm not in hurry for a re

relationship though.

Don't bother so much for time being, just enjoy the moments. Come to think of it, he is totally opposite of my type physically - it's like the joke of the century if we were together, i mean officially together. Physically aspects won't last long in a relationship coz there is no fountain of youth. But at least he is not ordinary gay man (well, he doesn't flash his body off in Facebook)  he's smart, sarcastic, witty,mean and disgusting.


I never really wished him properly on  Happy Valentine's Day (except the Nice Butt card). I'm not good in those lovey dovey words - so make it short and sweet. Everytime i see your puzzled eyes and the gap between us becomes closer and closer, lips inches away - honestly, there's nowhere else, i rather be. Thank you <3

Valentine's Day + Chap Goh Meh

I'm still contemplating between Chinese cuisine and western cuisine for dinner tonight since it's double celebrations; Valentine's Day and Chap Goh Meh happening on the same day.

I really want to have Lou Sang for very last time before culminating the Chinese New Year celebration. But it's the Valentine's Day also, I want to have a memorable and romantic dinner with my date. 

Wait a minute, since when I have a date? 

Alas, I'm not ready for a relationship. I'm ready when I want to forge a commitment with my partner. This means that I will delete all my gay apps, no more hanky panky outside and will stay low as if I already quit this gay community. 

However, I'm not belittle someone that I've been seeing lately. He is such an awesome and adorable lad. I don't want to commit so fast here as I don't think I'm well-established to give him the best. 

I know God is great. If He could speed up the process and bless me to be a better man, I'll take that lad to be my lifetime partner.

PS: I can go days without talking to you,months without seeing you but not a second goes by that I'm thinking of you.

Yes. Feb 14

"My name is Sue, I came to Adelaide in 2010 to study. I really really miss Chinese New Year in Malacca".

I know it's a very touching video from Cadbury but i have been listening the line above for thousand times whenever I'm surfing Youtube during Chinese New Year period and even now and it's killing me. Alright, we know who Sue is and she went to Australia to study 2010 - CNY is almost over, can someone remove the video? Or put my version better:

"My name is Alvin, I'm from Ipoh. I really really miss Chinese New Year coz i can eat a lot, gamble and literally sleep before dawn almost everyday during Chinese New Year period".

Aside from Youtube and CNY movies and hanging out with my friends, CNY for me now is less exciting now compared to last time. And I have a bad news for those who took a week long CNY break, your Monday blues tomorrow is gonna be overwhelming and I know you are reading this hahaha.

Anyhow, as CNY celebration is slowing fading away as approaching the Chap Goh Meh this Friday, bear in my mind that we have another celebration this Friday; Valentine's Day.

It's pretty disheartening to see those fags lamenting their single hood and dateless on Valentine's Day. Come on, is it such a bad thing to be single?

Even you have a partner also, why there is a need to be extra good and extra romantic on Feb 14? If you love a person so much, everyday is Valentine's Day for you. Maybe we are too busy with work until we forget our sentimental values with our lovers. So Feb 14 is a reminder that your lover exists in your life and you need to make that night special for her/him.

Seriously, I never have a chance to celebrate in Valentine's Day in KL before but i bet every restaurant will be packed and the flowers will be sold at sky-rocket price. Everything is so commercialized now.

Well, let say I have a partner, i have to be honest, I'm not that romantic kinda person, so  my Valentine's Day will be very very simple like eating burgers? Gift wise, come on, you don't expect me to buy flowers to a guy right? ( i know Bruno Mars told me to do so). I really don't know. Maybe I'll give my partner some stuff from the CNY hamper or left over biscuits. If you have better economical ideas for Valentine's Day, please do share with me.

I think i should stop writing now as the more i write, the cheaper i go.So before i end this entry, whoever wake up on my bed on February 15 morning , this little song is for you:

CNY: Celebration This Year

When was your last movie with your parents?

Recently or ages ago?

For my case, i watched all Chinese New Year movies this year with my mom (the best CNY movie is Vegas to Macau followed by The Journey). It's rather a heartwarming scene to see a whole family from little kids to grandmas and grandpas watching a movie together and sharing the laughter together in cinema.

The laughter isn't confined within the cinema but echoes out loud at the restaurants and even in the living halls.

That's what Chinese New Year is all about. The quality time spent together as a family and the valuable catching up with old pals.

Seriously, we have been working our asses off in this dog-eat-dog world to earn some decent money.

Yes,we can buy all the materials in the world with the money we earn but one thing we can't buy - the joy of laughter that you share with your family members and friends - it's priceless.

I guess we are pretty caught up with our work and that's why the only time we can share those laughter is during those festive seasons. Or shall we allocate more time for the ones we love the most?


Ok, i admit that i'm like an old uncle here and talk about life. Let me share some pictures that i took during CNY celebrations:

Simple and humble reunion dinner

Breaking the usual practice of counting down at home, this year, my family counting down to the new year at My Astro CNY Countdown concert at Kuan Yin Temple, Ipoh.

Like what every fag in Ipoh will do every year on the first day of CNY, the gay gathering at Friends Cafe. I only looked but i never touched.

                                    

My mom said this plant only blooms once in a blue moon - And it bloomed on the first day of CNY, what a good omen.

And of course, CNY will lose its meaning if without any loud bang!

Had my brew and catching up with old pals at Something's Brewing. Like any other years, the class gathering lives on. This year is a special one since it marks the 10th anniversary of our first met. Time really flies.  I still can recall that our conversation at the first class gathering was about getting into the university/college. As the years gone by, our topic ranges from study life/exam to work. And now, we talk about marriage.  I bet few years soon, our children will join the class gathering.

So this pretty sums up my simple Chinese New Year celebration. I guess the next festive celebration will be Christmas which long long way to go. Wait a minute, next Friday is Valentine's Day. For the first time after so many years, I'm celebrating it but don't get me wrong, I'm not attached just that i have a date for Valentine hehehe.

Anyhow, today is Chor 6, tomorrow will be Yan Yat, so i wish everyone of you Happy Birthday and have a prosperous Chinese New Year.

Open Your Heart

After many heartbreaks, many of us would swear to God that never fall in love again.

Not to say that i don't want to fall in love again. I believe love is the most wonderful experience until you can sing Beyonce's Love On Top out loud. 

I don't want to be emo in this entry, so let's be little positive about my love life. Well, i had failed relationships thrice and i had numerous almost relationships over the years. I guess they were too blind to realize how good Alvin Jude was. Let's put it this way, those who broke my heart are northern star to me who will lead the way to one's lovely open arms. 

To be honest, i have been very reserving whenever there is a slight of interest over the guys that i met. But there is always a reminder in me to pull me back from going a step further. Well, it's a good thing to be reserve so you would not have to risk another heartbreak again.

But then again, life is all about taking chances right? Let's jump over the edge to see whether there is a solid ground below or a hand to hold.

I'm not telling you to go head over heels in taking chances. Maybe know the person better first? This is the tricky part, even you think you know the person well but people do change. Since we are not God to see the future, we have no idea people will remain the same or change for the worse.

I'm talking too much here. why not text the person that you like and date him/her out for Valentine's Day and sing Love On Top out loud!!