In My Life

John Lennon once sang 

"There are places I'll remember, all my life, though some have changed. Some forever, not for better, some have gone and some remain"

Indeed, there are people come and go and some fated to remain in my life. 

I'm not that kinda person who lives next door coz I'm rather mean and sarcastic to my friends most of the time so it's hardly for me to have close friends. But for those who stay in my life, I really love them all.

For some who deliberately to end the friendship, well, you have made the choice and I don't even bother to salvage anything.

Though I'm quite upholding the notion of freedom of expression but when it comes to sissy and behave like super diva, please get out of my life. Especially those divas who love to boast around. Just hate those.

Love wise, I don't want this entry to be the longest entry ever. Love wise, just come what may. 

Though it sounds cliche but I've to admit here that I'm seeing someone. Seeing someone doesn't mean that I'm committed and I'm attached. Just exploring the potentials (yes, I'm using plural). 

Seeing someone doesn't mean that I don't open up the opportunities for others. Nevertheless, it's too soon for me to settle down or even to have a relationship - maybe next year.

Friend No More

"I don't want to friend you anymore"

Those were the words that we frequently would hear when were so small. As we grow older, the phrase above seems to be obsolete as we are mature enough to take friendship as mature way as possible. If ever misunderstanding and even uncomfortable situation arised,both true friends will open up and talk the issue over and solve it for the sake of the friendship.

I rarely talk or even think about this friendship thing - not to say I don't bother  my friends but I'm approaching towards end of 20s, comradeship is already well-built and the rest attention is much focused towards career and family (if I had one).

But to my surprise, these I don't want to friend you thingy is still happening to me.

Though it is not apparent words from him but his action tells it all. Well, this is not the first time happening, many times indeed.

I'm tired to give a fuck to all this shit.I always tell myself though we are gay but don't take things in sissy way and be a man about it.

You see, he's not young anymore why he still needs to be so sissy about it over the small matter. I do admit that I was wrong somewhere but the matter was just a small particle in the whole universe.

It has been a month since we last spoke and I'm feeling great actually. To be honest, before the issue happened, I had been reserved and trying to take a step back from him. I don't want to be a bitch to narrow down why I did that but I believe he had changed- change in a way that I didn't trust him anymore - in a way that the way he expressed himself publicly sometimes irked me.I had tried my best to salvage the friendship but his action told me not to give a fuck.

So let it be. Friends come and go and I don't bother anymore.

Rich Meets Poor (Part 2)

Im not finish yet. My previous post talks about different classes in society when it comes to gay love, let's extend this topic to friendship and networking or acquaintanceship whatever you want to call it. 

A friend of mine told me this "Alvin, I don't know how to mix with people with different background. My manager told me to dress well and branded in this corporate world and then, people will notice you. Of course, mix with same level of class or higher".

I don't deny that in corporate world we have to dress well or even adorn ourselves with brands but corporate world only applies to the office hour-after that you have to be bare naked to be your own self.

Maybe my friend is little bit shallow or he's just too desperate for corporate ladder, but for me, why extend the network of friendship to people who have different or lower background from you.

You see, I have long list of friends from filthy rich to hardcore poor. Filthy rich people- their topic will always revolve on how they spend their money.

On the other hand, the stories from lower end of society is rather inspiring. Look, they weren't born rich, so they have to work extra hard to survive. I do admit I learn a lot from them and they are the ones who embed 'humility' in my DNA.

Please don't judge people who are not up to your level. Rich people are only rich in monetary values but the people from  lower segment of society is far more richer in values of life.

But when it comes to gay people, they are a bunch of fags who are really realistic. So yeah, be wise when you forge a friendship with gay people. You would never know what people up their sleeves.

Rich Meets Poor

Time flies. Today marks the 12th anniversary of the 911 tragedy. Today also marks my heartbreak dated back two years ago. My ex is such a thoughtful person, he didn't want me to be lonely, so he chose this date to breakup with me so the world would share the sadness with me.

Anyhow, I'm so moving right now and I don't even know his whereabouts. I should make this entry more positive by making this statement: celebrating two years of single hood. Yay!

Though it's not the best time to consider about relationship but lately I've been wondering, disregarding heterosexual or homosexual love, does love bounded by  classes in society as in those high class, middle class and low class? 

I've no experience in this as my exs are middle lower class ( they deserve to have the term lower as they are low standard in thinking for dumping me) and most of the love stories among my friends are based on the same level of demographic.

What if two extremes fall in love? Will the high end guy be embarrassed to have a lower class lover? Will the family reject his son's choice like those Chinese black and white movie where the mother in law will bully and despise her son's wife?

The term love is blind gradually becomes a fantasy as we are living in a real world. I give you a scenario; will a rich fag which laden with branded items all over his body date a low class people? Definitely not. Even the rich fag's friend circle will be revolving around rich people.

If the rich fag doesn't mind the other guy's poor background, really, I will salute with utmost respect to that guy.

Actually, there is a case. A friend of mine, he's a doctor and he is dating a hawker food seller - two extremes come together as one item and they have been dating for years and they even live together now.

 

Though, I might sound diva and demanding in love but as long the person earns a decent living and can feed himself well, class differences will not be an issue. I still believe love is blind.

Two weeks of hiatus

Today is the last day of my two-weeks break before I commence to work in the new agency.

Though I really look forward but this job will change my lifestyle totally-the major one gonna be sleep early and wake up early since the traffic to my new workplace isn't that pleasant at all. Well, early bird catches the worm and sleeping early is good for health too. 

To echo the common gay lifestyle, I might consider to hit the gym too. Yeah, to get a hot nice body and lure all the men into my room. Nah, not really to get a fit body, that will be my secondary - my primary objective is to get a healthy body. You see, I'm aging and I need stamina I mean more stamina to go through the day.

Anyway, for these 14 days of hiatus from my work, it really provides me a great deal of personal space to do soul searching. 

Soul searching my ass, most of the time I spent sleeping, eating and hang out with my friends. 

Since I have no work to occupy myself just yet, so I have to admit here that I was thinking of someone. Not that I couldn't let go but I really miss his presence.

He's such a perfecto for me but fate only allows us to be friends not more than that.

I really wonder the next love that installs for me. Will he be a tall macho man or cute sunshine boy? I have no idea and I don't have the courage to do so.

You see those love sick thing especially in gay circle is rather superficial- good look, hot body and good bucks rule the day while the ugly and fatso are abandoned without any chance to try what love is all about. I know it's rather shallow to have this generalization but this is the truth. Well, I believe there is true love out there that against all odds.

What about me? Erm, not the time yet I guess? But Christmas is just few months away, it's been awhile I never celebrate Christmas' Eve with the one I truly love. 

But before I jump into another relationship, I really have to make it clear on my position. In relationship wise, I'm not sure I'm a top or a bottom or both. Hmmm..maybe my next partner should be versatile so he can accommodate my seasonal changes in my position.

This Is Us

I have something to confess, yes, I'm an one directioner!

Being a huge fan, I wouldn't miss the 1D This Is Us 3D movie. Though it wasn't that good as the Katy Perry movie but I had a good time watching it and it was inspirational too!

If you didn't know, if wasn't Simon Cowell, there would be no One Direction today.

Apparently,the lads joint the X Factor reality series in UK back in 2010. They had the audition individually but they didn't make the cut when it came to the boys selection.

However, it was Simon who grouped Harry, Zayn, Niall, Liam and Louis together and made them into an entity in the competition. That is how one direction came about.

They didn't win the competition but the fans went crazy over them and the rest is history.

From no one (actually, Harry was a baker boy initially) to international stardom; how twist of fate could change one's life.

Reflecting my life right now, well, not to say perfect but I'm contented. I know life is in palm of your hands but sometimes we need divine intervention to lead the way.

Like recently, I quit my job without any offers backing me up. I wasn't scared because I had the faith. I asked Lord -"please grant me a job". And my prayers had been answered and not only I've got the offer but the offer is from the agency that I really look forward to.

Even my tertiary education - I wasn't born rich so I had to rely on public universities but our sad education system  put me into some unknown uni. 

So I applied partial scholarship from Taylor's . But it was two days too late to submit, so I had to wait another sem in another year. But praise The Lord, I received the sweetest phone call amidst the disappointment.

"Alvin, the (some big shot) will be in Ipoh doing roadshow, you can pass to him directly and expedite the process and put you in the sem which will be commenced next month" Taylor's 

And I've got my partial scholarship to study PR  and now I'm a PR practitioner in a MNC agency.

Sometimes, you think it's over but it's not. It's not the end for you.What over is the path that you are traveling and subsequently you have to move to the next path. I believe if you have the faith, I believe the next path will be a blissful one.

P/S : I know I sound bimbo here but Zayn Malik is my favorite member of One Direction. He's so cute and so sweet! Well, he came from a single parent family and when he successfully earned his first gold from 1D, he fulfilled his promise to his family and bought his mom a brand new house. Aww....