Tuesday, August 5, 2014

The Precious Blessing

I just realized that my buddy has been living with his partner for months and best of all his partner's parents gave their blessing to my buddy relationship. 

How wonderful it is. They could enjoy relationship freely in their parents' eyes without any need to pretend and without any need to make the relationship underground. And it is really wonderful that his partner's parents could be proud and happy for their son's relationship.

Tough luck for me as I don't think I have that kinda blessing. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who is seeking the precious blessing. I'm pretty sure you too.

You see this gay thingy is still a taboo in our modern society. The greatest  pressure for a gay relationship is hide from your family members or if leaks out, it's even tougher when your family members never give their blessing and despise it instead.

I always believe that one's relationship is a very private thing-a situation which a world shared by two individuals and it's not an obligation to explain and to report  to anyone. 

But when it comes to family especially your parents, come on, you can't hide from them right. They will start interrogate why you are very close with that particular friend of yours.

Sometimes I really wish to go two steps ahead to my mom. Skip the 'gay confession' part and straight to point to her 'mom, this is my partner'. 

I wonder how she will react. Will I shock her til raising her blood pressure sky high or she will accept it nonchalantly like "oh wow".

I think most likely she will like "seriously? Stop joking. Why him?"

I don't know when I will come clean with my mom coz sometimes I feel like not nice of hiding since I'm her son. And by that confession, I hope she will accept my partner coz he is worthy to be recognized. 

On contrary, if I ever beg blessing from his family, I guess I'll be on my knees crying and begging and singing this song: 

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life?

Say yes, say yes 'cause I need to know

You say I'll never get your blessing 'til the day I die
Tough luck, my friend, but the answer is 'No'


  1. Well, at least Chinese are more accepting of this gay thing.
    I'm a closeted and non-practicing Muslim but my whole families are devout Muslims. like seriously, they hate the Jews for no reason (because Islam says so) and they don't like Chinese (ooh, but i love Chinese guys) and they despise Hindus. I love my family, but they will never accept homosexuality, they openly say all gays must be jailed and sent to hell :-(
    I understand how you feel and that's why I will never ever come out to them. I cannot imagine the pain, the hurt and the disgust they would feel if I come out. Sometimes, some secrets are best left to be buried along with us in the grave.

    1. But u can't hide from them all your life, can you?

  2. No, I can't, but knowing my family well, they will over react and start hiring a bomoh to cure me as Islam strictly forbids homosexuality. Heck, they won't hesitate to report me to Religious Dept to 'rehabilitate me'.
    Sigh...that's why non-Muslims will never understand how gay Muslims in Malaysia feel like. It would be nice if my family's open-minded and liberal, but that is not the case. Sometimes, I wish Islam would just go away.