Run Your Own Race

You win some, you lose some.

I guess many of us has taken the simple phrase above to lead their lives - unless you fall into 'ultra-kiasu' category who couldn't afford to lose.

Maybe I'm bit tired lately but I feel that I lose most of the time. Winnings never come close to me, unfortunately.

I'm not being emo here but just stating the fact.

Look, we are in a constant race with each other.Sometimes we are faster, sometimes we are slower in the race. For me, I always be the turtle. Competing in very slow pace.

I know we should not compare our lives with others but there is such thing called peer pressure. It will hit you hard when people around you are far ahead. Be it in career or ownership wise, it seems I'm really lacking behind.

Should I blame on luck or maybe I don't practice any religion in devout manner or the bitch has unleashed its karma, that's why it's bit messed up in many aspects of my life. I know I should take things positively but I've been positive for far too long.

How long should I be positive? The walls that I built couldn't hold any much longer. The negative vibes are creeping it. The foundation of the fort will give way soon. I've no idea what will happen to me by then - fall into deep depression or just load up a gun and pull the trigger.

Aside from being positive, another solution is to find another half, maybe he could bring me out from the despair.

No, no and no. After all I've been through, I've lost faith in relationship. I don't see relationship bring any good as it will all end up in broken heart.

Secondly, I'm not good looking nor I own a nice body, so I don't stand any chance to be attractive in this superficial gay community. And I'm a bitch, so please don't get near me. I know Christmas is coming followed by my birthday, but who cares anyway. Solitude is all I have now.

Even I wanna give love a try, I guess it will be tough since I have left a special spot deep down in my heart. As I move along with time, I believe it will be tough for people to reclaim that very special spot. Nah, just be it, since no one would be capable to reclaim it. Comparisons are easily done when you have tasted the perfection, right?

Moving along, I know most of us we think that we are lagging behind but it doesn't matter who are leading in front of you, we will reach the finishing line eventually.

I know it's tough when people around you are way leading the way -fuelled by many young successful entrepreneurs below 30 like Mark Zuckerberg, Ecan Spiegel and David Karp. But let me tell you this, there are successful people out there who only made it  only after 40 - Vera Wang, Stan Lee, Donald Fisher, Sam Walton, Henry Ford and Ray Kroc to name a few.

We are never too late..