Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Your lover is a control freak

I know I’m not the best person to judge people’s relationship as i myself failed in relationships all the time.
I can be silent of all the unflattering relationships in front of me but once it gets me annoyed, silence will be broken. Especially the relationship concerning my close friends.

Okay, I have this very close friend who is very attached to this guy. Honestly, I don’t like his boyfriend. His boyfriend is a control freak. 

Firstly, he forbids his bf to go out so late. Forbidding someone to go out late is a good gesture as the person shows concern on his partner safety to go out late night. But in my friend case, come on, I don’t think 11 pm is late. Even Cinderella can go home at 12 in the midnight. I think 11 pm is way too early and my friend is a dude. What sickening here is the next day, his bf will quarrel with him for going out so late and as the punishment, he will restrict my friend to hang out with me the next day.

Don’t even think that my friend could ever come down to KL to hang with me and the rest of my friends here because according to his bf “KL is such a dangerous place”. Really? I have  loads of girl pals who travel alone to KL and even to overseas, my girl pal can do it and why not my friend who is a dude?

Here is the epic part: so over the long weekend break, I went back to my hometown Ipoh. So I tried to date my friend out. Prior to that, his bf asked me to hang out with them, I said no because I had unfinished works to do, so I rather stay at home. So I asked my friend to go out the next day when I finished my work. He said no because his bf didn’t let him to do so. Reason being? I did not give his bf ‘face’ or respect as I declined to meet his bf. WTF right? Who the hell he thinks he is? A dictator from ancient history? Why should I give him face or accommodate him at the first place?  A middle finger more like it. I’m not a dog who needs to follow his order, I’m a grown up man. I don’t really care my friend is reading this or not, if he does, just tell your boyfriend to “fuck himself”. Really, and the worst part is that he restricted my friend to meet me up as I did not meet him at the first place.

Yes, until today I’m really pissed with this monstrous dictator. I know I sound disrespectful to my friend but honestly, I feel sad for my friend because I know we’re gay but sometimes gay man have to be real man also, my friend doesn’t constitute a true man after hooking up with him and even a woman is far more better than him. 

He could not make his own decisions, he lost his freedom and he is obeying to his bf religiously. What I worry the most is that he will be forever trapped in Ipoh and couldn’t come to KL or even outstation for his future career advancement just because his bf doesn’t let him to do so.

I really wonder do we need to obey each and every single word from our lover.To some extend yes. Come to think of it, I’m a rebellious  kinda lover coz I didn’t really listen to my ex. He forever asked me to sleep early and I never really listened. Even he was sound asleep, I was still hanging outside. I know he loved me and I disobeyed him doesn’t mean that I don’t love him. I go out late at night and even the things he didn’t like me to do, I would still do because I know it wouldn’t cause me harm and I know the things I want to do is for my own good and I love the things that I’m doing.

Being in a relationship is not about expecting your boyfriend to obey to you or restricting your bf to do the things he likes to do. Give them freedom. Give them a chance to make decision on their own. Even the things that he wanna do sometimes it irks you but seeing your lover happy for doing the things he loves to do, I believe you would be happy too.

I still could recall that everytime I wanna go out somewhere late a night, I would inform my ex-baby, then he would always replied me “Be safe. Rest early”. Maybe too much freedom so we didn’t work out lol…

To my friend, I don’t like your boyfriend and I think you need a new one.

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