Thursday, December 31, 2015

2015 : Bitter

As self-define in title, 2015 is indeed a very bitter year for me.

In April this year, I've lost my beloved grandmother who lost her battle against cancer. Barely two months thereafter, my grandfather discovered that he had cancer. The discovery came too late and he was too old to undergo any surgery. Not even six months after my grandma left, my grand dad passed away in September. In between that, another loved one of mine had left, he was my second ex.

This year also, I've ended my relationship with my partner. It will be pointless if we want to play blame game here. I believe each party has to take responsibility and initiative to make a relationship work. It was a mutual decision. I decided to let go because he deserves better and I'm not the person for him. I know that I can't give him happiness. So it will be pointless to waste each other time.

Aside from bitterness, to sum up, I've been living in my memories throughout the year, unfortunately.

The memories in the past will always be beautiful, am I right? Since it is so beautiful, inadvertently, we tend to go back to the past. The memories will lead us without realisation. If you find happiness in your past and if you are able to regain happiness in front of you, then I'll be very happy for you.

Though my happiness is in my memories, but I know i will never regain it. Happiness will never favour me anymore.

But on lighter note, I'm delighted that four of my girl pals got married this year. I have watched them how they fell in love. It really warmed my heart when I saw them walked along the aisle in their wedding gown. I hope my day will come eventually, oh well.

It's already late. Sleep early and gear up for the countdown tomorrow alright? Who am I kidding? I don't even have plan nor date for my New Year countdown. I guess it's okay. I can watch the fireworks from my window pane.

Happy New Year everyone and I can't wait for this shitty year to end!

I know I will end my last entry of the year with my favourite song for entire year. But 2015 is a great year for music. So it's pretty hard for me to select one song for this year. So to be fair to everyone, let's rewind the popular songs of 2015 by Youtube itself:

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